First Entry

It seems as though even the hardest tragedies to cope with have been picking meat from my bones for 2 years, Tuesday was the 2 year Anniversary of Garrett's suicide, and for the first time in 2 years when I think of him I can hear his laugh and see his smile once more. I'm finally becoming adjusted to the fact that I may never see any of my friends again, and as sad as that is it keeps me closer to them than ever before.

Life has never meant so much. I think for the first time in 19 years I'm actually going to put forth effort to see to it that this grave I'm in has a ladder out of it. I'm done being the one that sits in pity, the one who cries over the past, the one that has had everything stripped from him. It's time that I regain what's rightfully mine. I'll do any and everything in my power to see to it that my life actually means something.

I've tried my hardest just so you can comprehend
There's nothing but scars left upon my skin
And no matter what you say, they bear your name
But I'm not here to just cast blame or shame
My words stand stronger than the vastest armies
By blade, bullet, or words; they'll never harm me
For pain is just like a drug, you build up a tolerance
Yet still I'm searching for something with substance
For something more than what I've been dying for
I shall live a life of a legend that stands out in lore
View me as divine or the one who brings end
It's a fact now, and you can no longer pretend
I'll bring the rains and shadows to smother city lights
And I'll bring the flames to glow in the night
Cities laid to waste and families left in ruin
The words of death and darkness, I speak fluent
So won't you join me, atop the clock tower
And watch the cities burn in this divine hour?